Abandonment

A-ban-don-ment: a noun. An act of condemning someone or something by ceasing to take an interest in them. A four syllable word we don't often hear, but we've all experienced it. Maybe it was too subtle for you to notice. Think about it. Has anyone ever done something to cut off all their connections with you? Said something so they would never have to run into you again? Maybe it was just for a little bit, a temporary abandonment or one that affected you forever. The coach that always favored you benched you for the entire championship game, the game that you had practiced every day for, your dad left your family when you were only a toddler, never to see his face again, your bestfriend chose to be on the side with the person you're fighting with, thus questioning your friendship, or maybe even your prom date ditched you to go to an afterparty, leaving you to find your own way back home. No matter how big the act of abandoning was, it ends up hurting someone in some way. But from that experience we can gain so much more than the typical sorrow. Misery and Sadness are unavoidable, but it's what we do to cope with them that differentiates each person and their characteristics.
It’s not an easy thing to cope with, abandonment. It makes you feel like crap, something that automatically makes you feel inferior. It’s sometimes difficult to confront the fact that it happened to you. We often try to apply the cliché quote “Everything Happens for a Reason” to help us understand the situation. But then we quickly give up when it doesn’t work on the first attempt. We think of the possibilities why this happened to us; out of all the other people in the world, it happened to YOU. Well what I’m trying to say here is that it happened to YOU for a specific reason. Use this unhappy experience into a beneficial learning moment for yourself. I genuinely believe that in every situation, big or small, monumental or petty, easily forgettable or one that takes deep consideration, that we can find a meaning inside. But the problem with society today, is that we seem to be too busy to find the time to think it over.
So I leave you with a challenge. When a time of hopelessness comes, turn it around and make it to your benefit. It’s way better than just moping around. It looks, seems, sounds, hard, but honestly, it’s not. These miserable times carry a greater purpose, a mask waiting to be unveiled. We all endure through some level of abandonment, but it’s not a pointless. It has a reason and it’s up to you to search and apply it. People will always come and go, but it's what you learn from them, what sticks with you as you keep living your life, that's important.
Going back to the previous examples: Instead of giving up the sport in general because the coach that favored you then benched you during the championship game, you try harder and build yourself to become a stronger team player; maybe leading you to win the MVP award. The best friend that left you can be difficult. But in this scenario, instead of taking revenge on your ex-friend and evolving into some venomous “mean girl”, you learned how careful you must be when choosing what to trust your close friends with. It tests the loyalty of your relationship between you and another individual. For the example of the fleeing father, instead of asking your single parent to spoil you because you’re “deprived” of a regular family, you help out more and learn responsibility at a younger age. You also learn what not to look for in your future partner. Finally, for the example of the lame prom date: Instead of moping around, feeling sorry for yourself, take the fun experience you had at prom and forget about the guy. I mean, Prom can be a big deal in high school and if you went with a date that couldn’t respect you, well they don’t deserve your time of thought anyway.
When you trip or fall on the ground, instead of mindlessly stumbling back up then tripping again moments later, figure out what made you fall and fix that problem. Then carefully get back up, become stable, return walking to your destination, and make sure you don’t fall because of the previous reason. I urge you pick yourselves up when you fall, at the time when feel low and useless. If we give a little thought to our problems, they can always be solved.